My boomer mom's cheap online shopping habit drives me nuts
grist.org
Dear Leslie, I’ve noticed a real divide between my mindset and my mom’s. She’s a boomer, I’m a millennial. When she furnished her house through Amazon and Wayfair, the thing she was proudest of was how cheap it all was — same with clothes. For me, cheap usually means bad and disposable, not something worth […]

Dear Leslie,

I’ve noticed a real divide between my mindset and my mom’s. She’s a boomer, I’m a millennial. When she furnished her house through Amazon and Wayfair, the thing she was proudest of was how cheap it all was — same with clothes. For me, cheap usually means bad and disposable, not something worth bragging about. I don’t know whether to try explaining my point of view or just let her have hers. Am I missing something about where she’s coming from, or is it OK to think I know better here?

— Generational Divide

Submit a question for a future Ask a Climate Therapist column

Dear Generational Divide,

I’m glad you’re bringing curiosity to the divide you experience with your mom, rather than just frustration. I think the key here is not about who knows better, but about being able to build a cross-generational bridge — something absolutely crucial to the broader climate movement.

Ask a Climate Therapist tackles your questions about how to navigate the emotional side of climate change, with leading climate-aware therapist Leslie Davenport. Have a question? Ask it here!

As you likely know, a lot of boomers came of age in an era of real economic turbulence: oil-crisis inflation, layoffs, and mortgage rates that hit 18 percent in the early 1980s. Getting more for less was truly a survival strategy — one many of them absorbed at home first. Their own parents had lived through the Great Depression and World War II, and that generation’s habits of rationing, saving, and stretching every dollar shaped how boomers were raised.

Our economic stressors — and our sources of bargains — have changed over time, but for some people, finding the best deal never stops feeling like a win.

Of course, this isn’t just a boomer impulse. A college student today who shops for a back-to-school outfit at H&M isn’t necessarily anti-sustainability or pro-fast fashion. Consumer choices are often about what’s within reach, not what a person truly values.

I’d recommend starting here: An empathic statement as simple as, “I get why that felt like a success for you” could validate your mom’s thinking on this, and from there it may be easier to have an honest conversation about why you would approach the home furnishing project, for instance, with different priorities. You might also be able to open the door to even more intergenerational learning. Try asking your mom what she used to make from scratch, or what her own mother taught her to fix instead of replace. The meaning of sustainability was different then; it was just how things were done.

Finding an alignment with your mom matters beyond just resolving family tension, because intergenerational alliances carry real political weight. And the prevailing belief that older generations don’t care about the planet is overstated. Research from King’s College London found that roughly 7 in 10 people across every generation, boomers included, think that environmental problems are serious enough to justify real changes in how we live. But keep in mind, the actions taken by different age groups may be different. Research points to some general trends: Older people tend to be more consistent voters, while younger people are more likely to turn out for protests and the like (though some organizations are aiming to buck that trend by specifically mobilizing older Americans for climate activism).

If sharing your sustainability values with your mom is important to you, look for the common ground where you can build that intergenerational solidarity. Try meeting each other halfway — share small things you each already do that are beneficial for the planet. If you’re open to learning from one another, you can invite each other in on your beliefs and practices. Two people, two generations — one relationship that’s worth the effort, and one planet worth uniting for.

In this with you,
Leslie

Leslie Davenport

I’m Leslie Davenport, a licensed therapist, educator, speaker, consultant, and internationally recognized voice on the emotional and psychological dimensions of climate change. If you’ve got a question about climate and mental health, please consider submitting it for a future column.

Submit a question for a future Ask a Climate Therapist column

More from Ask a Climate Therapist

This story was originally published by Grist with the headline My boomer mom’s cheap online shopping habit drives me nuts on Sep 25, 2026.

From Grist via This RSS Feed.