Write something deranged in my online diary Make a call to my good friend VladimirBelittle someone less powerful than meTry to make Epstein disappear.Have a minion drive me to my golf courseBawl out a reporter, call her “dear”Get a TV star to be secretary of warTry to make Epstein disappear.Stage a fake assassination attemptWalk out the next day with an unmarked earPay my wife to hold my hand in publicTry to make Epstein disappear.